Jobs I've Kept Because of My Co-workers.

No need to re-rack.

Hot co-workers certainly make showing up for work almost on time and partially in uniform more feasible for me. Here's a list of some crappy jobs (back in highschool and in college) I've kept simply because of the view from my work area:
1. Hardee's Front Counter Opener (6am-10am M-F)
2. Centerpiece at Le Maison De Mange A Trois.
3. Outbound sales representative at Total Bastard Telemarketing.
4. Subway Sandwich Artiste
5. Subway Manager
6. Head of Security for a small local college library.
7. Bartender/Trainer El Conquistador's Authentic Corporate Mexican Restaurant and Cantina.

Why My Last Relationship Failed.

Last picture taken of me and the ex-girlfriend as a couple.

I get asked all the time things like, "What makes you go out on the town like you do?", "How do you deal with all the attention from being The Heart-throb?", "Where did you get those clothes?", and "Will you please ask your entourage to settle down before we toss your leather pants-ed ass?".
Most of the answers can be traced back to the last long-term relationship I held, and why it didn't work out. It's clear from the above photo that we were doomed because: 1) I'm outgoing and spontaneous, 2) She's a high-maintenance snob, 3) The Ass was hanging around with us WAY too much (he took the picture). Ultimately, it was The Ass who convinced me to end the relationship, by hooking up with her one night after work.

Reservation for Three at Le Maison De Manage A Trois

I met these three ladies while working part time as a centerpiece at this outdoor cafe downtown. The Ass was working there too as a busboy, and we invited the 3 out with us. Eleanor (far left) and Britanny (middle) were highly touted recruits for the university's soccer team, and they got bent all out of shape after The Ass made his soapbox speech about how all soccer players smell like feet. Jeanette (far right) kept flirting with The Ass all night because she thought he was Michael Stipe.

Double dose.

We've been a little slack with the posts, so I figured we needed to step it up with ladies. These two were sharing a bottle of Sweetwater 420 until I introduced them to PBR and the American Heart-throb.

The blonde's name was Tiffany and she had a bad crush on The Ass ever since she saw him at the flea market haggling over the price of some rope and a machete with a guy with an eye-patch. Her friend's name was Amber, or Kelly, or Valerie, or one of those damn Saved By The 90210 names. She kept calling me "Zack", and the Ass "Slater". The Ass refused to give them a ride home because he was low on gas.

8 Seconds!!!

I'm still pissed Luke Perry didn't credit me with teaching him how to ride so authentically for that movie.

The Ass went out of town to establish his alibi, or for vacation, I can't remember which. Either way, he took his big ride with him, leaving me with this as my only means of transportation. It wouldn't be so bad if the damn thing didn't eat/crap so much, or wasn't firmly bolted into place.